Friday, June 13, 2014

With people, it's Difficult

How easy is it to let go off people? Dramatically clich├ęd question. And I never thought I’d be asking myself this. But then there are a lot of things I never thought I’d be doing, like hardly writing in the 10 days since the vacations started. So yes, that’s me. And this me has been bothered with this question for quite long. And the inference is, no it isn't easy. When the person is close to your heart, whom you have pampered all these years like a little sister, who’s been the hoarder of your silliest secrets, it isn't easy. But it has to come easy at some point. And here it is. The moment I wished had reached out to me much earlier. But nonetheless it is here now. And I am ready to let go off her. We hardly have that friendly wave left between us, let alone being the Best Friends. The bond got killed somewhere in time. No accusations. No spits. Yes, it often pricks not knowing what actually went wrong, but it happens, and I think I am sensible enough to accept that. If I feel betrayed at moments, that doesn't mean she is all wrong. May be she gets the same vibe. Or may be, she doesn't care at all and has never considered the friendship as special. And lastly, not may be, but surely, I get over the top emotional. Having tried to clear things out, it didn't really help to bloom things the same majestic way between us. And now finally, it’s time I stop trying. And I have, and am glad.
Bitterness apart, I’ll make sure she never finds me out of the elder sister grandeur, and will always stand the same way with the same smile whenever she feels the need. After all, there are some relations you don’t make just like that. When approving of it, you might have made some oblivious promises with yourself. And here I guess I promised to keep my box of love always open, for the sister I could never have. It no more pains that she isn't a part of my crazy wishes, knowing nothing about my current life. This was how it had to be. :)

Just that.
(Image source: Google)

Amid this all, I have realized it’s not just her, but a few more people who chose to turn around and exit my way. Some for their own convenience and some for mine. And perhaps I was stupid whenever I tried stopping those people, acting desperate. I hate having ever behaved that way. I like the new me, no more wasting hours lamenting over people. May be I am doing the same to someone. We crib over old friends not being that much in touch. But give it a thought, haven’t you too made a new life with the new people around? Tag yourself intelligent if you are among the ones who live in the moment, and laugh with the present people, instead of crying over not being with the ones who used to be there. You are still good friends if meeting or talking even after a year long gap, doesn't change a bit. If you abuse and pull legs the same way, then mate, that’s a cool fate! :D There is one thing I am beginning to realize-> With people, it’s difficult. There are very few people with whom I strike the best balance. And guess now I need to make peace with that fact, and yes, keep these people tight close.

And now, enough of my blah blah. I don’t know what got into me that I sat down to type it all, when I have got to pack up loads for a family trip. Instant action, but wrong timing perhaps. God only knows what it was all about But you survived reading it till here, so I believe it was a good quality crap. And with this, I wrap.

Thank you for stopping by.