Saturday, May 24, 2014

Are you a Complan Girl?

 Respected Complan people, the post in no way tries to take a dig at you. I promise, kids still trust you more  than their genes. They love "I am a complan boy". I love it too. So please drop the plan if you are thinking to  sue me.

To everyone who has asked me that question and to those who are intending to,

My height. Believe me, it’s nothing extraordinary. I merely stand at 5’8”.But the world around me refuses to let me live in peace with that. Okay, your daughter isn’t as tall, so that’s your bad you didn’t marry some Tall, Dark and Handsome uncle leaving that potbellied caricature kind of husband of yours. That doesn’t mean you leave your girl after me poking me with tips to reach my level. As if she really has the talent B-). Be happy with what you are kid. You look awesome that way (Grrr...I wonder how many girls I have lied to with that)

People around tell me I should be proud of my height. Really? What have I actually done to achieve that? For God’s sake, stop patting me for something that’s inherited. It does me no good. Okay, you think it’s a rare sight. Cool. Say a word or two, and please leave. I am in no mood to lay out my diet chart for you. When I retort like that, I know there are people mumbling curses for me and planning on what all spices to add and go demean me among others starting with how much pride I take in being tall. Well, in that case *knock knock* I didn’t even care about it till the time you parted your lips just to say “Hey Bhagwan! Kitni lambi hai!”. Arey isme bhagwan ki kya galti!

There have been instances when I have been so ready to just land a punch on some people’s face. But obviously, I can’t do that, because one, they mistake me to be generous and willing to answer their height queries, and two, most of the time they are relatives I am supposed to respect (I just hope none of them is reading this :-S). Along with annoyance, it also invites embarrassment. It all started when during my childhood, I used to stand taller than my brother, who’s actually a year elder. And as it is some unsaid rule, I was merrily assumed to be the elder one. In fact, during one such incident, to get an entry in to a fort, I was charged a ticket but he wasn’t. Do I need to say more?  Thank goodness, it was soon discovered he had some medical problem, and now, phew! He’s a level up. One problem solved, but what to do with the aunties and uncles who shoot arrows at me, every time I am forced to face them, with their seemingly favourite line “Ladka dhoondhne mein bohot problem hogi”, followed by a “Khi khi khi”. I really want to tell them aloud that we’ll find a match for me, just the way you’ll find one for your fat-nosed and makeup advertising daughter. Instead I just reply with a “Main khud dhoondh loongi aunty, aap pareshaan na hon”, obviously followed by a fake smile.

Fine, they can be forgiven, after all they need something to start their gossips, right? But what to do with those bunch of morons in restaurants, parks and outside the university gate, who get into this serious discussion on whether I look like Deepika or Anushka. Dump them in a bin, or directly kill them? And also those juniors, who come up to me with the question “Di, do you have this book?”, and end the conversation with, “Di, what’s your height?”, and that too when she herself is just an inch or two down. Some approach just to ask that.  Great! I am not giving you the book. And yet another type of bugs are those who find it really funny asking, "Can't you just lend me a bit your height?". Believe me, it's not funny. NOT FUNNY AT ALL.

Why, o, why?
(Source: Google)

No, no, my tall-tale doesn't end here. Don’t you want to greet the loveliest people of my life, who are the sole ones highly concerned about me? Well then, they are my classmates (and even few friends -_-), from junior school to college, who think I am wasting my time studying Psychology and trying to be Writer, when instead I should be pouting and blowing kisses to people I don’t even give a heck to, that is, join modelling. Now, don’t get me wrong there. I really appreciate models, for all the patience and vigor they carry. But you can’t be advising every other person who according to you carries an alien height, to shed everything and walk the ramp. And by the way, whom are they even suggesting that! Someone, who can put even a drunkard to shame, courtesy her walk,  and who is an enviable talent when it comes to sporting a Fashion Disaster. So unless and until you don’t want the stage to be set on a literal fire, save your preaching for someone worthy. And don’t worry, in case if I ever accidentally walk down the ramp, I won’t forget giving a sentimental speech equaling  my height, thanking you all for the encouragements you sent my way while bitching about me in your hostel rooms.

(Source: Google)

Till the time I come up with my list on 'What all it takes to stand tall',

The Bournvita girl, now and forever.

Thursday, May 22, 2014


“Dreams remind you that you still have got a lot to live for.” -Ti

Sometime back, in my usual clung-to-the-phone moment, somehow a chat with a friend led us into a very interesting discussion on Dreams. And it was some fun, real fun after a hellish Economics exam (I say that for every Economics paper, good or bad). And voila! If nothing, I at least got to write something.
No one, I guess, is oblivious to the charm of dreams. If not presently, then may be at some point in your life when may be you were all  young, fabulous and lively, you had harboured dreams, some silly, some intense. And no, I am talking of the dreams you get while snoring away, that wake you up with a jerk because your professor was having a devil laugh on awarding you with a D this time. This happens with me a lot. In high school, many a time I woke up panting ‘cause I got nightmares of getting a ZERO in English tests. I even used to cry after that :D So no, not those, but the ones you build up all in your head, with eyes stark open, and store in your heart. Somewhat your Wish-list.

I have got dreams in plenty. My wishful wishes. Some of them I want to come real just in the way I have imaged them, and some I’d rather leave to be just dreams. There are some I have had since I ever knew to handle my imaginative sense, and others which got in to the line over the years, as I watched, read and listened people and places (courtesy: Internet, magazines and television).
The list swings from little wants like spending some never ending days in a hill station, to tempting ones like writing a story, stirring enough to bring out tears.
Adding a little more to it, it ropes in wishes and dreams like these:

>> Learning biking, and riding a Bullet.
>>A tiny-cosy shelter with wooden and antique interiors, all to myself. Somewhere near Kerala backwaters, or on hill top, or near a stream (the location keeps on changing).
>>Getting lost in woods, and discovering a tree house. I won’t go clich├ęd and say I want to do this alone. I’ll prefer having someone by my side. Someone equally interested, maybe. Okay, I might get scared alone. So even if that someone is unwilling, I’ll pull him/her along.
>>Learning Spanish. Yeah, I want to visit Spain (Right guess, it’s a ZNMD effect)
>>Adopt a kid, or may be kids, once I am efficient enough in every way to take care of one. And I’ll make sure the kid turns out to be witty and intelligent, unlike me :D. And yup, I’ll love to adopt a girl.
>>Sit all alone, with feet dangling in a lake, or  on a hill top, or beach side, and SING, in a voice I never knew I had. (Jeez! That Alia Bhatt song has really seeped in too much, and by the way, I just made this one up :P)
>>Discovering a chocolate-land and enjoying chocolates, preferably dark chocolates, in abundance without caring about the teeth!
>>On a cold night, in a hill station, with the street all deserted and just the light of the moon showing, I want to step out and just walk, in a pair of jeans and sweat-shirts, and may be act a little drunk. Just act. I want to do this for no particular reason. May be because I love hill stations, and I love Moon.
And et cetera et cetera. This, well, obviously is just a glimpse of my imaginative highs. I know it wasn’t some awe-inspiring list, but as I said, it was just a glimpse. The list trails on and every now and then, something new is added in the Castle where these dreams are nestled.

Spain! ^_^ Someone book me a ticket, pleeeease? 

Okay, THIS is the place. I am getting lost here. Thank you, Google.
In case you come searching for me, you'll find me there on the bench, sleeping.

Evidently, yes, I am dreamer. Small.Big.Unrealistic.Alluring.Anything and everything. And probably, only a handful of them may come in to the light, but then what will dreams be if they all turn real.

“Imaginations, lined up in a tandem
That’s the thing about dreams,
Their soothing rhythm”

The P.S(s).:
I am not able to write the way that made people love me, I mean my write-ups :/ I am losing even the little humour quotient I had in me. Will try to grasp it before it slips down the gutter.
Don’t search for the relevance of the Post title. I just like the word :P
That ‘Ti’ is me. Hehe.

 I hate long gaps between exams -_-

*Pic credits: Google